This is called the state of denial or being in the closet. And, no, you are not experiencing an identity crisis. Top 4 Powerful Ways to Overcome Relationship Anxiety And ROCD. They are however "LGBTQIA+ friendly therapists" and are open, welcoming, and supportive towards LGBTQIA+ people. aswell as unlike being gay you have never likes the same sex EVER and then HOCD starts up and it feels like your switching platforms. They arent afraid to be gay. Theres a concept known as false attraction. Keep in mind that this feels like youre attracted to him. The medication also works as it blocks the obsessive thoughts. Through this exposure, your therapist will help you develop response prevention measures based on what you hope to accomplish with therapy. Great post man. The problem with HOCD is that you cannot stop questioning it. You noted that you dont want to be in a same-sex relationship because you are Christian. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is an effective treatment for HOCD and can help you learn to manage your anxiety and live a full life. Thats just having issues with your orientation. My graduate work is in mental health counseling, and I use Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) therapy because its the gold standard of OCD treatment. This can be an effective treatment for patients who can identify their negative thoughts and work to change them. On the other hand, boys had no feelings for girls and were crazy for other boys until they had that one thought of being gay. Due to the overwhelming amount of men posting on here with irrational fears that they are gay, and I have never read so many different forum posts on the same exact topic by the way, I thought I would make a post of my experience both with being in the closet as a homosexual and my sexual obsessions dealing with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. they cant. How does your religion view individuals within the LGBTQ community? One such experience is shared by a boy. By self-assessment and monitoring, you can easily identify whether it is OCD or false thoughts are triggered by HOCD. Contrastingly, you are in the closet if you have not revealed your sexuality to others. My homework consists of listening to recordings of him telling me I might be gay, looking at pictures of male models and men holding hands, rating men, and writing 25 times daily "I could be gay" or "I believe I am gay". As of right now I don't feel much of a difference since I only started with this therapy a few weeks ago but I have all my trust in this. Unlessyourebisexual,youwontfeel any sexualorromanticattractiontotheoppositesexifyouretrulyhomosexual. Interruptive thoughts exacerbate the anxiety. CBT is a form of therapy that enables you to recognize and alter harmful thought and behavior patterns. HOCD has been around for a long time and, to those in the know, is an established and well-understood sub-type of OCD. While pedophilia itself is defined as sexual attraction to children, pedophilia OCD or POCD is a subtype of OCD that causes fears or worries that one might be a pedophile. I have experience working at intensive in-home services for children & families, and intensive outpatient programs, preparing me for any challenge you may be facing. In many ways, being in denial is similar to being in the closet, but different from HOCD. Im also curious about what sorts of rules you live by? A selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor is the sort of medicine used to treat OCD the most frequently (SSRI). Constantly reassuring yourself that you are straight. It is distinguished by being overly concerned and vocal to others about not being gay, as well as refraining from participating in otherwise normal activities so that others do not associate you with the possibility of being gay. Top Freelance Writing Jobs For Beginners UK: 20+ Best Websites! Regardless of age, OCD makes living with joy a challenge, which makes Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) therapy so crucial in OCD care. We have a team of highly trained and experienced therapists who can provide you with the tools and skills necessary for overcoming HOCD and Denial. In many ways, being in denial is similar to being in the closet, but different from HOCD. But somewhere it is believed too. AmI pretending its not happening? By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. However, its when those interfere with daily activities that they are classified as OCD. Many straight men are afraid of being gay. It will still be decades before the general public is comfortable with the entire situation, and even longer before homosexuality is treated as just another gender, equal to being straight. Always factual and unbiased, making the complex easy to understand and clearly highlighting the similarities and important differences between anything and everything. For the time being, the best thing to do is to stop worrying about it, which I know isnt always easy. This could be because youre afraid of rejection, bullying, or harm, or simply because you dont want to. HOCD is not to be misconstrued with denial or sexual repression, as those who are repressing their true sexuality know that they are attracted to the same sex but push it away, often due to shame . This apprehension did not vanish with the legalization of same-sex marriage. I found out about HOCD by myself, when I read about it once and it seemed to describe my situation to a T(Oh yeah I'm contantly reading and searching for stuff too). Is HOCD Just Denial?? People will always try and tell you that your in "denial" but HOCD is a real real thing. All Rights Reserved. To be clear, the therapists mentioned on this page are not necessarily an LGBTQIA+ individual themselves. I want to bump this back up to the first page. The difference between HOCD and denial. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. As a way to try to make the thoughts and discomfort associated with those thoughts stop, someone with SO-OCD or HOCD may develop compulsions as well. Cookie Notice * My gay friends seemed to fear people's responses and reactions more than they actually . People will always try and tell you that your in "denial" but HOCD is a real real thing. Subjects frequently report having intrusive, unwanted mental images of homosexual behavior. We are ready to support you both in person and online! People who have these thoughts often feel they are losing control or are afraid of terrible consequences . How can you be gentle with yourself through your discoveries? Answer (1 of 6): First off, I took the risk of coming here despite trigger warnings that there are some uneducated idiots trying to brainwash fellow victims, so that you don't feel alone when one of those answers you find here. Mindfulness practices can be used to tolerate distress. I enjoy a girls beautiful face, ass, tits,etc. Don't let them become more than that. I've read this & it's a great thing you do to share your story to help others. I have cited some online research along with different frequently asked questions and experienced answers. This all my spike people with HOCD and sound absurd but this is exactly how you beat this. Diminished attraction to the opposite sex. Anna Freud has referred to denial as a defense mechanism involving the refusal to accept reality and thus blocking external events from awareness. Privacy Policy. Amongst gays and lesbians, bisexuals have the highest rate of considering and/or attempting suicide. Ive been working in the mental health field for over 7 years, with experience treating OCD within crisis and anxiety management. I really wanna grow up, have a crush on a guy, marry a guy, and have a boyfriend but Im scared that in the future I wont have these feelings and Ill give up. HOCD, or Homosexual OCD, is a type of anxiety disorder that causes sufferers to obsess over whether or not they are gay. Pedophilia obsessive-compulsive disorder (POCD) is a subtype of OCD with intrusive thoughts or obsessions based on fears that you might be or become a pedophile. Denial about your homosexuality can be traumatic for the individual and their families trying to support them or stand up for them. ROCD2 - Constant focus on a relationship or loss of it. It is different nowadays. They may also try to compulsively engage in activities that counter the obsessions, such as straight men who overcompensate by watching hetero porn or avoiding all contact with members of the same sex. I just found this sub. For more information, please see our Could this be ROCD? Coming out refers to the act of revealing ones homosexuality. Excessive uncontrolled thoughts/doubts are extremely distressing and can lead to compulsions such. I dont want comments telling me to accept this cause thats what I DONT want. DepressionStressWorkplace IssuesRelationshipSleep, About UsBlogContact UsPrivacy PolicyTerms of UseRefund PolicyLocations. My Updated Thoughts Top 20 Best Rappers In The World (2022) Information, Writing a Perfect Instagram Text in 9 Steps, Cochlear obtains FDA approval of Kanso 2 Sound Processor, first off-the-ear cochlear implant sound processor with direct smartphone connectivity - Cochlear ProNews. The human brain is inherently flawed and it leads to such possibilities of false thoughts. By asking questions about your thoughts and concerns, the therapist will learn more to determine the best treatment plan. All in all, you can figure it out through online sources as well. Difference between DNA Transcription and DNA replication, self-doubt of an individual regarding their sexual preference and identify, avoiding contact with people that have previously identified themselves as gay/lesbians/bisexual, unwanted sexual thoughts about people of the same sex, excessive fear of being identified as homosexual, Fully aware of the condition but denying about it, Trying to minimise the effects of the situation instead of accepting it, Blaming others/ external elements for the situation, Refusing to talk about your homosexuality, Ignoring the concerns and advice of family and loved ones, When confronted about your orientation, denying outright about lt, Projecting it as a problem and blaming others for it, www.choosingtherapy.com/hocd/#causes-triggers-of-sexual-orientation-ocd, www.simplypsychology.org/defense-mechanisms.html, www.apcbham.org/2019/10/01/denial-why-it-happens-and-how-to-overcome-it/, www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/internalized-homophobia. Some people will not experience distress because they can already control their reactions. Keara E. Valentine, Psy.D., is a postdoctoral fellow at Stanford University School of Medicine in the OCD and Related Disorders Track, where she specializes in the assessment and treatment of OCD and related disorders. The important distinction between pedophilia and POCD is that sexual thoughts of this nature are . This is a thread in another sub that I posted describing how the entire shitstorm started: https://www.reddit.com/r/bisexual/comments/7vfza0/majorly_confused/. And M.Ed.? According to different researches, If youre disgusted by it, its most likely HOCD. I've never had actual OCD(I'm a very messy person, no rituals etc.) Unlessyourebisexual,youwontfeel any sexualorromanticattractiontotheoppositesexifyouretrulyhomosexual. Contact us today to schedule an online therapy or download our free OCD treatment app on Android or iOS for more information. Often, the plan will include exposure and response prevention (ERP) therapy, which is often regarded as the gold standard of OCD treatment. Im also a CHRISTIAN and 13 years old who is in the 8th grade. Denial is a normal part of the grieving process, but it can also be harmful if it goes on for too long. I read that HOCD can cause arousal, as well. I know for a fact Im attracted to females but the fact that Im even questioning myself in the first place makes me feel like there has to be something there. ERP gets right to the problem, and once you've learned how to manage OCD, the joy of life can fully return. and our HOCD OR GAY - WHEN YOU NEED TO KNOW FOR SURE https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XnDE3OCyp-kPrivate support group https://www.facebook.com/groups/660241161106617. Do the same with girls. It becomes heterosexual OCD as well. The individual may first experience sexual orientation fears when noticing that a member of the same sex is attractive. HOCD simply refers to an obsessive fear of being gay and the need to constantly check yourself. Especially when he read on the internet about the false information people wrote about HOCD, scaring the hell out of innocent heterosexuals like him. Theres a concept known as false attraction. Keep in mind that this feels like youre attracted to him. This type of OCD is often characterized by excessive doubt. These obsessions foster doubts; doubts about whether their thoughts are significant; doubts about who they really are. However, there are some key differences between the two conditions. Here are some tips: There are a lot of similarities between HOCD and denial, which can make it difficult to tell the two apart. Just stay connected till the end. 01 Sexual Orientation OCD (previously called Homosexual OCD or HOCD) is a subset in which sufferers constantly question their sexuality. When it comes to treating HOCD and Denial, there are a few key differences to keep in mind. Also known as Homosexual Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, HOCD is a form of OCD where a person fears unwanted thoughts that they might somehow be attracted to people the same sex. Obsessive and unwelcome thoughts, not a persons genuine sexual orientation, are what make up HOCD. Its too soon for a label while youre still figuring things out. Ive been a licensed therapist since 2017. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. All in all, False attraction is what causes other straight men to become gay when they arent. What may be worth considering is how you want to cope with the thoughts. Obsessions are unwanted and intrusive thoughts, feelings, urges and doubts, while compulsions are repetitive physical or mental actions performed in an attempt to relieve distress and anxiety. 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